“Even when things are going badly in the world around us, we can still find personal meaning and deep happiness,” Kent M. Keith reminds us in “Do It Anyway: The Handbook for Finding Personal Meaning and Deep Happiness in a Crazy World” (2003).
He talks about paradoxical people who live “The Paradoxical Commandments,” sharing their stories of perseverance and resilience, and asking questions that challenge us and make us reflect on our own lives.
My grandmother Janet was one of these “paradoxical people.” She shared her time to visit elderly and ill people, she shared her month to churches and ministries, and she shared her beautiful voice in song. She was one of the most gentle, caring, and gracious people I know.
She seemed to know intuitively what most of us struggle with, and what Keith identifies as the central ideas of his book: that we choose how we respond to events and there is more meaning in service than in power.
Keith lived in Hawaii and was a vice president for YMCA of Honolulu. I loved reading his stories with Hawaii connections, such as the 442nd Regiment during World War II, who gave the best they had despite prejudice and injustice; Wally Amos, who lost everything he had and then rebuilt; and Franchot, who built plantation fields that closed down.
Choosing to live the “Paradoxical Commandments” starts by making two distinctions: 1) loving and approving are not the same thing; and 2) there are many kinds of love.
Every now and then, we all need to be reminded of the Paradoxical Commandments:
- People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway.
- If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway.
- If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
- The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.
- Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.
- The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway.
- People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
- What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.
- People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway.
- Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.
What do you do anyway, even when you think it won’t make a difference? What do you do anyway, because it feels meaningful and right?
Better Hawaii 