I thought that I don’t make new year’s resolutions anymore. Looking back, I realized that I do make resolutions… I just don’t call them resolutions.
Resolutions are for legal contracts or board meetings.
You might call it a lifestyle change, but that sounds too extensive. You might call it a change of habit, but that sounds too defined.
Instead, think of them as “un-resolutions,” choices that are informal and easy-going. A big part of it is practicing mindfulness, bringing my attention to a choice and not judging myself if things don’t work out.
There are no goals or measurements of success. I don’t really hold myself accountable. And “un-resolutions” don’t need to have an end-date.
Two years ago, without my realizing it, my un-resolution was to take a risk on a new job that I wasn’t sure I was ready for. It’s a job that still challenges me and often takes me out of my comfort zone.
One year ago, my un-resolution was to say “yes” to more invitations and opportunities. I made a conscious choice to do it, but I don’t try to reach a specific number of opportunities, and I don’t feel guilty when I turn something down.
It’s only February, but I already know my un-resolution for this year, and it’s a little different from the previous years: I want to strengthen my language skills. My foreign language skills.
(Really, we need a better word than “foreign.” World language? International language?)
I tried Hawaiian in middle school, Japanese in high school, and Spanish in college. It was always a struggle for me and I retained very little, a few words here and there. My mind was like a foreign language sieve, not a sponge.
Maybe, without the anxiety of grades, I can let myself learn without pressure or expectations.
I’m not sharing this because I want someone to hold me accountable. I don’t have any expectations for myself, no milestones, no time-limits. It’s an “un-resolution” that’s attentive, forgiving, and on-going.
What were your new year’s resolutions? Or if you don’t make resolutions, what choices have you made this year?
Better Hawaii 